Maharaj once told me: ‘There are times when it becomes impossible for me to teach anyone. No matter where I look, I see only God, wearing many masks. Who am I, the teacher? Who is to be taught? How can God teach God? But when my mind comes down again, to a lower level, I see the ignorance in man and try to remove it.’

Maharaj spent most of his later life in a state of high spiritual consciousness, coming down only in order to teach and help us. His awareness of God had become so habitual that he would experience mystical visions even while conscious of the external world around him. He rarely spoke of these visions, and when he did so it was only to his brother-swamis of disciples.

Swami Vijnanananda, a disciple of Sri Ramakrishna, said of Maharaj and his visions: ‘The gods and goddesses are not myths, they are real. They are the many aspects of the one Godhead. I know this because Maharaj used to see and talk to them.’ I shall record a few of Maharaj’s visions in this chapter.

Ma Durga
It was the year 1901, a few days before the annual Durga Puja. Maharaj was sitting on the bank of the Ganga at the Belur Math. Suddenly he saw Mother Durga walking on the surface of the Ganga toward the Math grounds. She passed under the sacred Bilva tree in the Math garden and then disappeared. After a short while Swamiji arrived by boat, came to Maharaj, and said: ‘Raja, make arrangements at once for the worship of Mother Durga.’ Then he told Maharaj that he had had a vision of Mother Durga being worshipped at the Math. Maharaj, in turn, described his own vision to Swamiji, and they began at once to prepare for the worship. Since that date the special worship of Mother Durga has been held every year at the Belur Math. Maharaj also performed this worship at the MathsMaths is the tool of science in Kankhal, Varanasi and Madras. He once told Akhilananda that he performed this worship in obedience to the Mother’s direct command. Akhilananda records that during the Durga Puja in Madras, the power of Maharaj was specially felt by his disciples, and their minds were raised to higher levels of spirituality.

Belur Math West side
Maharaj used to observe Christmas every year by offering special worship to Jesus. The story of the Nativity was read aloud from the Bible, followed by meditation. Fruit, bread, cake and wine were offered in the worship. Sister Devamata, an American devotee who happened to be present on one such occasion, records the scene as follows:

‘When I had finished reading, the intense stillness in the air led me to look towards Swami Brahmananda. His eyes were open and fixed on the altar, there was a smile on his lips, but it was evident that his consciousness had gone to a higher plane. No one moved or spoke. At the end of twenty minutes or more, the look of immediate seeing returned to h is eyes and he motioned to us to continue the service.’

After the service, as Maharaj was partaking of the Prasad he remarked to Sister Devamata: ‘While you were reading, Christ suddenly stood before the altar, dressed in a long blue cloak. He talked to me for some time. It was a very blessed moment.’

Swami Vishwananda relates the following incident:
‘One day Ramnam was sung in Maharaj’s small room at the Udbodhan office, where he was staying while Holy Mother was visiting her native village. There were only half a dozen people present. Maharaj was repeatedly in ecstasy. Sometimes his body shook, sometimes it was stiff. He uttered a few syllables expressing great joy. The place became surcharged with spiritual vibrations. I felt I was transported to another realm. When the singing was over, an attendant of Swami Premananda saluted Maharaj before taking his leave. As he bowed down to him, Maharaj exclaimed: ‘Foolish boy, where will you go now? What happened here was more than meditation!’ The implication was clear. Why should the Brahmachari leave this spot where God-consciousness was so tangible?

‘In Maharaj’s presence we understood the meaning of these words: ‘The guru expounds the texts of the scriptures in silence. The doubts of thee disciples are dispelled.’

The guru sees directly into the inner nature of the spiritual seeker and addresses himself to the aspirant’s highest yearnings. On an afternoon of a beautiful spring day in March 1916, a young girl came to the Math to see Maharaj. Forced into marriage by her parents, she had run away from her husband to the Math, and as soon as she was brought into the presence of Maharaj, she fell at his feet saying: ‘O father, I have no desire to live a worldly life. I wish only to spend my days here at the Math under your guidance. My only desire is to worship God and realize Him. To Him alone I would surrender myself, body, mind, and soul.’ Deeply touched by her evident earnestness and guilelessness of character, Maharaj replied: ‘My child, this is a Math! How can you stay here? Go back to your parents; they are worried about you. Stay with them; study the scriptures and read the teachings of Sri Ramakrishna and Swami Vivekananda. Pray to Sri Ramakrishna. He knows the yearnings of your heart and will answer your prayers. Later on you may go to the Nivedita School for girls, or to the ashram of Gouri Ma. You have the true understanding. Vain indeed is this human birth unless one has love for God!’ But the young girl refused to return to her parents’ home, so Maharaj blessed her and sent her to the ashram.

After she had left, Maharaj walked slowly into the library where he found Swami Premananda writing a letter. He sat down beside him, and almost immediately went into a mood of ecstasy. Those who watched him could catch only a glimpse of the ecstatic joy which shone through his radiant face. His expression and behaviour were indescribable. Swami Premananda watched him for a while, then, turning to the young monk who was present, said: ‘Watch Maharaj! That mood in which you see him is known as the paramahamsa state!’

In a little while Maharaj returned to normal consciousness, and said to Swami Premananda: ‘Who can understand the divine play of Sri Ramakrishna? Swami Vivekananda wanted to see an ashrama established for young women and now I see that some day soon his desire will be fulfilled. Young women are becoming imbued with the ideal of renunciation as taught by our master. That girl who came today was like a goddess in her beauty, her purity, her earnestness, and her guilelessness!’

There is a saying in Sanskrit: ‘Places of pilgrimage are made holy by the visits of the seers of God.’ The enlightened soul does not need to visit holy places or temples, for he has realized the living God everywhere. Wherever he lives, that place becomes holy. Nevertheless, we know that enlightened men often journey to shrines and temples. They do so because they find there a greater manifestation of God – a more concentrated revelation, as it were. This spiritual concentration has been caused by the visits of many holy men and women and by the devotion of pilgrims throughout the ages. When a saint goes to a holy place, he contributes his own revelation to the spiritual treasure house for the benefit of the generations that will follow.

The temples of India are dedicated to deities of many forms and aspects as well as to the impersonal, formless Godhead. This one Godhead comprises all divine forms and aspects, yet is beyond form and definition. Sri Ramakrishna used to say: ‘Never set a limit to the Infinite by trying to define It.’ And indeed, it is evident that the infinite God must have infinite forms of expression. ‘Truth is one, sages call it by various names,’ says the Rig-Veda, the ancient scripture of the Hindus.

In an orchestra, different instruments play different notes, but when these notes are harmonized, the combined effect is of one beautiful unity. Maharaj reached this unity through the realization of Brahman. An ordinary mystic may be aware of only one instrument and hear only one note – one part of aspect of the divine whole. The illumined soul, however, hears all the instruments, the entire orchestra. Thus it was that Maharaj, while ever conscious of the one Brahman, was able to see the many divine aspects when he visited the temples dedicated to them.

At Madurai, in south India, there is a famous temple of Divine Mother Meenakshi. When Maharaj entered it and stood before the deity, he exclaimed: ‘Mother, Mother!’ and lost his external consciousness. Swami Ramakrishnananda, who was with him, saw his condition and held him by the arms to prevent him from falling. Seeing Maharaj standing unconscious in ecstasy, the priests and devotees who were present gazed at him in silence. An intense stillness pervaded the temple and lasted for more that an hour. When Maharaj regained his normal consciousness he went silently away. Later he described his vision of the luminous form of Divine Mother.

At the temple of Rameswaram, which is dedicated to Siva, Maharaj was again absorbed in Samadhi. Even after he returned to normal consciousness, he remained for some time in a state of ecstatic joy.

The temple at Kanyakumari is dedicated to the Divine Mother Kanyakumari, in the form of a little girl. Maharaj lived there for several days. For a while he would stand silent and motionless before the Mother; then he would become ecstatic and begin to talk to Her. Whenever he entered this temple, he lost all external consciousness.

In the temple of Vishnu at Tirupati, Maharaj had a strange experience. The vision he beheld there was not of Vishnu, but of thee Divine Mother. On inquiry it was found that the temple had once been dedicated to Mother, and later had been changed into Vishnu temple through the influence of Sri Ramanuja.

In the temple of Jagannath at Puri, there are three images, Sri Krishna stands on one side, his brother, Balaram, on the other, and Subhadra, his sister, stands in the centre. Here Maharaj once saw the living Krishna on the altar; the three images had disappeared. Maharaj visited this temple many times, and whenever he went there he seemed to dwell in another realm, and his face shone with a radiant smile.

Of the many places of pilgrimage that Maharaj visited, he loved Brindavan and Varanasi most. He used to tell us that in these two cities a spiritual current is always flowing, and that this current grows particularly strong at certain times of the day and night. He said that if a man meditates and practises japa in Brindavan at midnight he is greatly helped by the spiritual current, and if he meditates in Varanasi at four o’clock in the morning he may easily become absorbed into the higher consciousness. In later years when Maharaj visited the temples at Brindavan and Varanasi, he would ask his disciples to sing and chant and he himself would go into Samadhi.

Speaking of Varanasi, he said: ‘Many have found enlightenment there. If the aspirant struggles a little to reach union with God, he may get it very easily.’ Only once did Maharaj initiate a disciple in Varanasi. After that he refused to do so, because, as he said: ‘Shiva gives liberation to all those who live and die there.’ A disciple, who later became Swami Akhilananda, was once in Varanasi with Maharaj and wanted initiation. Maharaj told him, ‘Holy Mother doesn’t initiate any disciple in Varanasi. I have made the same rule.’ Then in a sweet affectionate voice, he added: ‘I will initiate you when I go back to Belur Math. Don’t be impatient. In my mind, I have already accepted you as my disciple and have made myself responsible for you.’

Once, during the celebration of Sri Ramakrishna’s Birthday at Belur Math, while the disciples were singing and chanting, Maharaj went into Samadhi. He was carried to his room, completely unconscious of the outer world, his face shining with a heavenly radiance. He remained in this condition so long that his brother – disciples became anxious. They told Holy Mother, who was present at that time, but she showed no anxiety; indeed she seemed well pleased, and said: ‘Don’t worry about him.’ Then she went to Maharaj, touched his arm lightly and said in an affectionate voice: ‘Rakhal, I have brought prasada for you. Eat my child.’ Maharaj immediately returned to the normal consciousness, and, seeing Holy Mother, prostrated himself at her feet. He used to say: ‘It is very hard to understand Mother’s greatness, unless she herself reveals it. Through the grace of Sri Ramakrishna, one may recognize the divine Mother in her.’

Once, while Maharaj was visiting Holy Mother, a female disciple of Sri Ramakrishna said to him: ‘Rakhal, Mother wanted to know from you why a spiritual aspirant must worship the Divine Mother first.’ Maharaj answered: ‘Mother has the key to the knowledge of Brahman. Unless She shows Her grace and opens the door, no one can enter the realm of Brahman.’

As he left the house where Holy Mother was staying, Maharaj began to sing and dance, clapping his hands like a little boy. Whenever he was with Holy Mother, he always acted in this child like manner which expressed relationship between them.

One day at Madras Math, I was in the Math’s library, whose door opens on to a large hallway. The shrine is directly above. As I opened the library door, I suddenly saw Maharaj from a distance, with arms outstretched, moving about the hall as though he were dancing. He was alone and completely absorbed in God. Speechless with amazement, I watched him, thrilled by the sight. Suddenly his eyes fell upon me, and arms still outstretched he advanced in my direction. However, I at once began to feel nervous and started to run away. I didn’t consider pure enough to touch Maharaj while he was in such a lofty mood, and I was afraid that my presence might disturb his ecstasy. So I silently shut the library door and went away.

In his later years Maharaj had the vision of Sri Ramakrishna everyday. He used to tell me: ‘I see Sri Ramakrishna everyday and talk to him.’ To another disciple he said: ‘I see Sri Ramakrishna wherever he chooses to reveal himself to me. By His grace, you also will see him and talk to him.’

Although Maharaj lived almost continuously in a high state of consciousness, he was very natural and human in his behaviour. Even when he was quite a young man, Sri Ramakrishna said of him: ‘Rakhal is the kind of mango which still looks green outside when it is ripe and sweet within.’ And this was true throughout his life. Whenever he could, he would hide his ecstatic mood and act in the most normal way. I have already mentioned his sense of humour. Balaram’s wife once dreamt that she was feeding Maharaj. Taking this for an omen, she invited him to a sumptuous feast which she herself cooked. When Maharaj had enjoyed the dinner, he turned to her grandson and said: ‘Tell your grandmother to dream more often.’

His love of gardening has been referred to in an earlier chapter. At every Math he visited, he gave valuable advice as to the laying out of gardens. Often he would gaze at the blossoming flowers and remark: ‘Look! There you see the worship of God in His universal form going on unceasingly.’

Maharaj also loved music. He always had a band of musicians or a singer with him. Maharaj himself didn’t sing much – just occasionally a line or so. But every morning he would chant a various names of the Lord in his sweet voice. One day an expert musician was playing musical scales. Maharaj went into spiritual mood. A devotee complained that no devotional songs were being played. This jarred Maharaj. He turned to the devotee and said: ‘Don’t you realize that sound is Brahman?’

Even though he was interested in everything and all the events of his time, his intimate disciples could see that beneath this apparent interest Maharaj always remained completely detached. The things of this world rolled off him like a drops of water off a lotus leaf.